Perfect Day Part 2

It had always been a dream of mine. I¨d seen husky sledging occasionally on Christmas wintery movies, and thought how amazing it would feel to do it, and how unlikely that I would ever get the chance to experience it.
I was wrong. Ushuaia doesn¨t only have a superb ski resort, it is also a center for siberian husky breeding and so there are ample opportunities to fulfill the dream.

After our superb powder day at the slopes, we were picked up at the hotel by an Argentinian guide called Walter. A half hour trip in the back of his muddy 4x4 and we arrived at the Husky Center. Lots of newly wed Spanish couples and a few Argentinians awaited as excited as we were to start the evenings programme.

The first dog I spotted when we went out into the snow was known as Bear, he is a pure breed siberian husky and as so he has one ice blue eye, and one brown eye with a sparkling white background. His fur is so thick that you struggle to get your fingers deep enough into it to feel were it begins, and he is very calm and placid as soon as you begin to stroke him. Approaching him was a little intimidating because most of the huskies are ready to go once they are in their harness, so they bark and jerk forward with excitement.
Chris and I sat in the rickety wooden sledge with the six dogs up front, one loud comand and away we went. It was really different sliding through the snow seeing the dogs ahead of you. The funny thing about it which you never picture happening, is that for some reason the running makes them want to have a poo. A couple of times one poor dog would look funny and start to try and poo whilst hopping, at the same time the others dragged him along! We did have to make a few strategic stops for them to do that, and unfortunatelly the ride wasn´t as fast as I had expected.
Never the less I felt so happy, the cold fresh air lapped me gently on the face as we travelled through the forest in the twilight.
A two kilometer trail takes us to our destination, a hut made entirely of logs put together in a conical shape with an opening at the top for the huge fire that´s burning inside.
I´m thinking to myself that this isn´t too safe, but none the less I enter the make-shift shelter. It´s cosy and warm as we all sit around the fire for the evening, eating hot food, drinking mulled wine (Chris has my share) and listening to our guide playing the classical guitar, and singing old folk songs that tell stories about The Land Of Fire.
After they´ve all consumed a fair bit of mulled wine the songs get less classy and we all join in to sing La Macarena. With full bellies and some feeling well oiled, we step out of the hut into a very stary crisp night. The dogs are howling in the forest which is a bit spooky, and they are ready to take some of the group back to the Center.
For us, there´s something different on the way back. A brand new, shiny, dangerous looking skidoo is awaiting. Chris is excited beyond all belief, so much so I´m worried he might pee himself. And I am a little worried as I have to go on the back of his skidoo!
It´s pitch black, only the headlights illuminate the snow clearing. A 1 minute instruction and we are off! It is soooooo exhilarating!
I could see Chris´smile from the back of his head, and the woohooing was deffening.
Then it´s my turn. And my oh my those things can fly! I don´t know what came over me but I full throatled that thing. I couldn´t really help myself, I felt like I was in a video game and none of it was real. It takes corners amazingly but you have to have a good eye for uneven ground up ahead, otherwise you can really see how you´d go flying off it.
It made out stomachs float and our bodies tingle, it was great!

Without a doubt, this was a day I wouldn´t mind repeating over and over again.

Perfect Day Part 1

Sam and I remember one hot night in Thailand, sat on the beach drinking cold beers. We started one of many of our lenghtly (and alchol induced) converstaions. The question was..."If you could have a ground hog day, what would it be?". We spoke of dive trips, heliskiing, champagne, sunseeker power boats, etc.
For those of you who havent seen the film "Ground Hog Day" then it is about a guy who keeps waking up each morning to the same day. He is stuck in a loop. He has the same day over and over again until he works out how to stop it.
Well, we think we just had a perfect ground hog day....

We wake up, eat a great breakfast and then arrive at Cerro Castor. The car park is empty because its a week day. We slip into our brand new Salomon boots and snowboards and jump straight on a queueless lift. As we sit alone on the lift and watch the miles of empty slopes below us, we realise that we cant see the groomer lines instead we can see about 1 foot of fresh snow.

Sam boarding alone through the center of the Cerro Castor. Not another person insight.
We reach the top of the mountain, alone, and board down across miles of untouched light fluffy powder snow, without another person in sight. Sam cant stop smiling, its the first time she has been off piste, and she is a natural. Turn after turn we both kick up huge archs of snow spary. This carries on for a few hours, with Sam doing her first black run which she glides down with ease, not stopping, or falling.

Sams first Black run "El Zorro" named after the foxes you regularly see running around there.
Later we hit the board park, which of course is empty. A few unsuccessful 360s later, and I ease my bruises with a hot chocolate and cognac.

Over Sams head but missing the chair lift above.
The afternoon clears into a perfect blue sky day which we spend making fresh tracks, not queuing once and barely seeing another person. We cant believe what an amazing resort Cerro Castor is as we sit having drinks back down in Ushuaia.

It has been the best day snowboarding I have ever had. After my world tour of ski resorts covering Japan, France, Austria, Italy, New Zealand, Chile and Argentina I can safely say Castor is probably my favourite (and it only has 3 lifts). We both have a quick rest before Ground Hog Part Deux starts at 18:40

Boarding The Land Of Fire...

Today I snowboarded at the most southerly ski resort in the world, Cerro Castor, Ushuaia, Tierra del Fuego.
The landscape here is unbelieveable. You have a real feeling of being at the end of the world, thousands of miles of grey freezing ocean surrounds white craggy mountains seperated by giant U shaped glacial valleys.
There is deep snow even lower down than the first ski lift which is at 190 meters! The snow here is perfect even though it is late spring, and once again totally empty pistes.
Ushuaia is also a major Husky dog breeding area, so tommorrow night we go on a BBQ and Husky dog sleigh ride through the forests.
We will probably stay here snowboarding for a week.
Sams angioderma and hives improved since last night, she spent today in bed again just to make sure she was feeling totally better, so hopefully she will be able to come up the mountain tomorrow. We are trying not to get too excited though as it has come back worse after getting better before.
Wicked place!

Rio Gallegos

As you all probably know, Sam isn´t very well. She picked up hives/angioderma in Peru. It´s not threatening to her health, but causes large burn like marks all over her body, from the soles of her feet to her face. The angioderma makes large painful grape sized lumps on her neck, wrists and ankles which hurt so much she cannot walk. Last week it got worse. We saw a dermatologist who took a blood test, and was visibly shocked by the extensiveness of the blotches. She got a high fever, was sick, and consequently has been lay in bed for 4 days. On day 4 we decided that she should make the 4 hour journey from El Calefate to the provincial captial Rio Gallegos so that we are better positioned to fly to Buenos Aires if her blood test results found anything dangerous. At the moment Sam is in bed quite happily getting over the fever watching dreadful South American soaps. I spend as much time as possible with her but occasionally leave to get food, and make sure the internet is still working. Therefore I get to see.....Rio Gallegos......THE CRAPPIEST place on earth! Imagine all the worst parts of Slough, Brieley Hill, Dudley etc...., and double it.

Think mud where grass areas used to be, several layers of old adverts pasted onto derelict shop walls, cracked and missing pavements, deserted rust ridden cars lining the street, every third shop occupied with cheap beige drab clothes, metal bars covering windows. I´m in hell. Its like going on holiday to Port Talbot.
Most backpackers dream is to go somewhere unknown, untouched, somewhere new and magical where a story of adventure can be told over dinner to friends for years to come. Admittedly, this never happens anymore, everything is too dicovered. I did meet one guy who trekked alone through the jungle of thailand on the rumour that a long house tribe lived deep in its mists, he eventually found it, convinced the tribes guards to invite him to eat dinner with the chief. Only to find himself sat next to two old ladies from the Hilton down the road on a day trip.
I however think I have completed the backpacker quest, I have done what no other has done before me. I have now spent TWO nights in Rio Gallegos. I ask the heavens to open up, the ground to swallow me, for the love of god GET ME OUT OF HERE!

Glacial Beats

On the bus towards one of South Americas highlights I meet my life counterpart, Rich, who has spent 4 years living in Swansea, surfs, kitesurfs, is over here snowboarding on a one year trip having left a job in computers. Unfortunatley in order to justify the extortionate price they charge you for the bus ride there, a ´guide´ speaks for the entire 1 and 1/2 hour trip interrupting our memories of Swansea bars and the Gower peninsular.

Anyway, Perito Moreno, some background. I am induring a boring speech so that I get to see one of earths few still advancing glaciers. It is unique because of its position. It flows and ends in Argentinas biggest lake directly opposite a penisular of land where you are able to stand and watch it. "Watching a glacier?" you all say, "That sounds seriously dull". Oh contrare muchachos, this is one of the most spectacular (i used that word again) sights, sounds and feelings I have ever experienced. The 60 meter walls of ice hundreds of tonnes in weight regularly break off, crashing into the lake with a rib shattering, heart stopping cannon fire noise and vibration. As the icebergs hit the water giant tidal waves roll towards you, and quite embarrassingly it makes people shout things like, YEAHHH, and GET IN!!!!! Jenny, a Colorado girl we met horse riding, stamped her feet and screamed. Rich also used various descriptive words as he punched the air.
Once every 3 years the glacier advances to meet the peninsular, thus creating a dam, water is blocked from entering the lake and slowly builds up a huge pressure on the ice. A few months later and the dam bursts, about a cubic mile of ice breaks into the water, the noise from which can be heard 80 kilometers away in the town of El Calefate.

Unfortunatley, this is one of those blog entries when I fail to impress upon you the power of this sight. No video, photo, or description can ever describe what it looked like. You are all just going to have to come here to see it yourself.

Chris

Icecubes

After a few nerve recovery beers, and a SHEPPARDS PIE (wierd) with a couple of cool guys from our hostel we hit the sack ready for an early rise in the morning.

7:30am we woke to a big snow storm. Today is the only day I want it to be really hot so that the glaciers melt and break off into Argentinas biggest lake. Clearly nature had different ideas.

We spent the day on a catermeran visiting 5 glaciers (Upslar), dodging icebergs on the way. It was awesome. We saw one collapse which was spectacular (crap word, but appropiate), the noise was like thunder then a gigantic splash into the lake creating a huge tidal wave.

We took a walk through a forest to see some more glaciers. It was a great day, although tomorrow is supposed to be way better when we go to the Moreno glacier which is the most active glacier in the world, with collapses every 15 minutes or so.

Boom Boom
Chris

L.A.D.E Flight UG574

Which would you take? A thirty hour straight bus journey, or a three hour flight with low cost airline?.
Having both recently read the book ´Alive´ where the plane crashes into Andes and the survivors have to eat the dead didn´t stop us choosing the later when leaving Bariloche on Sunday.
In the book Alive, it explains that in the 1970s you could only fly over the Andes in the morning because the air currents created by the mountains in the afternoon were too dangerous (The jet planes of today don´t have that problem). As it turns out, the plane in Alive was delayed and they were forced to fly across the Andes in the afternoon. The plane crashed, with only 16 survivours, who eventually ate everypart of the dead, including the lungs, eyes, and brain. Eight finally managed to make it out after being trapped in the mountains for a few months.

There was one neglected check-in desk for L.A.D.E when we arrived, and ´Demorado´(delayed) flashed in a mustard yellow on the departures board. Despite which, a queue started to assemble at the desk. It was headed by an unashamed young couple snogging, who seemed to get by without air for a serious length of time.
Unfortunatley for them, it wasn´t long before an unkempt steward appeared at the desk. He was flanked by short round man wearing country attire, which struck me as odd.

Our L.A.D.E flight, not over the Andes, but along them south towards El Calefate was due to leave at 10:40am. Our turn at the desk gives me an oppurtunity to ask after the nature of our delay. The steward confides in a hushed voice that our original plane "broke", and in desperation not to cancel the flight they have drafted in a ´reserve´ smaller aircraft. It had to come from Buenos Aires so we were delayed. The new departure time would be 14:30pm. Great.

Three milky teas at the sterile airport cafe later and to all our horror we watch our plane land.
Through the large glass windows I see an Airbus, printed on it in royal blue lettering over a glimmering white surface ´Aerolineas Argentina´. To the right, some 200 meters away, I spot a small battered ex-military 1967 built propeller driven 47 seater Fokker. It´s ancient, and you can tell. There are brown marks down it that could be reminisant of a fire. Everybody in the waiting lounge was visibly on edge. We were in the same situation as in ´Alive´. Andes. Delayed. Afternoon. 1960s aircraft. Sweaty palms.

On boarding the plane we noticed a dotted square with a sign that said "Cut here in emrgency", found that the seatbelts didn´t work and the seat infront of Chris didn´t stay so if the lady leant back she would be lying in his lap. After a little broken spanish conversation, Chris agreed to prop the full figured Argentine lady up with his knees. This was a painful decision which he was to regret. This feels like suicide.

The blades begin to spin as miraculously we take off in our first propeller driven historic aircraft. The noise is insane, the propellers make your ears tingle, and inside the rhythm varies reminding me of a toy robot about to run out of batteries. The pain in Chris´ knees was visible in his face. I´ve experienced turbulance before, but this is something else. Immediatley we feel the effects of the mountains below as the plane twists to either side and drops hundreds of feet in seconds. Passengers are being sick, occasionally grown men scream as the wind swats the plane as if it was an end of summer fly. The pilot, trying to get beneath the airpockets plummets nose down like a torpedo hurtling towards the earth. It swept us sideways with violence and we dropped so fast that our stomachs were shaken up into our throats, bursting to project out of our mouths like foul food. Finally, one hour later we land safely in Esquel. I´m not keen to get back on for the next 3 hour leg of the journey, and we discuss staying overnight in Esquel until the original plane is fixed.

I feel better after a 20 minute break and agree to take the next leg. Chris has a bottle of Cognac in his bag, and promises if things get really bad we can at least have some fun.

Fortunatley we manage to change seats and take off is smooth, so is 99% of the flight, until we start to descend for landing. The plane has to fly low anyway, giving us some amazing views, but the ground approaches visibly quickly as the turbulance kicks in again.
My palms are wet, my throat dry as sand. The plane is swirling all over the place. If you´ve ever been on Oblivion at Alton Towers you´ll know that falling sensation, except for this time there are no tracks, no safety harness, and no Kodak moment. Just sheer terror as the gut renching thought crosses your mind..."this is it". Dropping, rising, twisting, wining, you can hear the engines struggle as it gets battered around. I´m not alone, a robust man sits in the next isle, (who Chris later tells me he was eyeing up to eat if things turned bad) grabs onto his young friend infront of him. It´s involuntary, but desperatley hard, done without embarrassment because of the situation.I hear him whisper that he will kiss the floor like the pope when he lands. Middle aged men make loud innapropiate jokes about death behind me. The shrillness in their laughter betrays thier hysteria. It reminds me of the uncontrollable giggles I once got at a funeral.

Every minute feels like hours, but eventually the 1967 relic regains stability and firmly held breaths escape tight chests, filling the cabins stuffy air with relief and gratitude. On landing the passengers erupt into cheers and clapping, the male steward who had looked like an undertaker till now cracks a wide smile.
Hands clapsed together in the fresh air of the airstrip I thank God out loud that I´m alive. Other passengers tap the tarmac firmly as if to suggest they will never leave solid ground again.

Thirty hours straight on a bus, or three hours on a low cost airline? I´ll have to think about that next time.

The Viewing

Being seasoned travellers we´ve learnt a few useful lessons. The top two are:
A) Always confirm the price of something before you try it, taste it, take it, or order it.
B)Always ask to see a room before you check in.

The latter of those came in very handy a few days ago when we were looking for a place to stay in Bariloche. Here´s what happened...

The first two hotels we saw were nice but full. Opposite the second one we spot a bleak looking place, and say to each other something along the lines of "What the hell, it won´t hurt to look".
We pass a few old ladies hanging out on a brown velour sofa in a tumble weed atmosphere, and head for the reception desk at the end of the dark, nicotine stained lounge.
We pop the question to an old man who asks an ancient man to show us room 14. I patiently follow his hobling steps with Chris in tow, and after what seems like an eternity we reach 14.
We´re in quick sharp like trained S.A.S. Chris takes the bedroom, I take the bathroom. As Chris cases the joint for bedbugs, I do something on instinct. I lift the toilet lid and the sight before me causes a loud involuntary "Eeeeeerg!". Chris forward rolls into the bathroom and appears beside me. Together we both stare at the six inch tapeworm that has come out of someones arse! It´s still alive and is moving in a search like manner looking for a new hole.
A good few minutes of pulling faces mixed with laughter pass and we remember the dinosaur is waiting at the doorway. "Thank-you, mmmm....yeah we just need to see a few others" spill out of my mouth before we run arms flailing down the Road.

Sisters Birthdays

I do believe I missed my sisters birthday blog entry. Her B´day was yesterday. I do have an excuse, which is that she is lounging by a pool with a cocktail in hand in Tunisia, far away from a computer. I also spoke to her on Saturday before she left. Hope that is good enough for all you people who realised I hadn´t left a message. We miss Ruth millions. We look forward to her big smile, contagious laugh, and epic personality when we get back.


HOWEVER, I am still in trouble as I forgot to mention Ronnas birthday. To anybody who doesn´t know Ronna, she is Harrys sister and good friend who we miss alot. She also shares my sisters birthday. Hope you are well, I´m sure you celebrated true to form with a bottle of champage. We looking forward to big nights on the town in Marlow when we get back, and seeing Hugo row you down the Thames to Cookham for bottles of Trapiche in the Bel & Dragon.

Chris & Sam

Sorry For The Quietness

Don´t worry we are still alive. I can´t believe that we feel we have to write this entry after only 4 days of not updating the blog. I´m sure we were supposed to be getting away from it all when we left 10 months ago. Most other travellers email people once a month and ring home every two months.
Anyway, we are in El Calefate which is in deepest darkest Patagonia, and internet connections are painfully slow here. So slow that it is impossible to upload photos, so we are saving our blog entries until we arrive back in civilisation. We have some stories already written but just saved, not published. I saw one of the most impressive, rib cage vibrating, spine tingling natural sights I imagine exists on earth yesterday, so expect a massive update as soon as we get out of this communication void.
Big Love
Chris

Lago de Nahuel Huapi, Bariloche

Does Anybody In England Recognise This Thing.....

Don´t worry, you shouldn´t... because your British. You do occasionally see them at meat counters in Sainsburys, but because you´re British, you just look at it blankly, ingnore it, and queue up sensibly behind everybody else who has ignored the wierd ticket queueing thing whilst making sure not to stand too close to the person infront incase you invade their personal space, after all you expect that from the person behind. We are British. We are polite.

In Argentina THEY ARE EVERYWHERE! They need them. They have to have one in every possible place a queue may eventually form. I took this photo in the doctors this morning (wierd I know, but essential for this entry). If there isn´t a ticket machine thingy caos errupts, they barge, push, shout etc. Queuing without a ticket thing means war.

Sam and I are slowly getting used to it, and accepting it as just another step in the process towards being able to purchase or talk to anybody. See Next Time You Buy Anything In A Shop for further information on this subject.

Bull Sea Lion Attack!

You may remember that we made a great Italian friend called Angela. We travelled with her from Tahiti, through Rapa Nui then said our very hungover goodbyes in Santiago de Chile. She only lives up the road from us in High Wycombe, so there is no doubt we will see her again.
We have kept in email contact since Chile and two days ago we recieved the following amazing email from her......

Home already I hear you ask. Well yes, I got back a couple of days ago. Let's just say I had an "incident". As ever, sod's law is functioning at peak performance in my life. Think back to the last email I sent, where I foolishly said that I had been sick, but not quite enough to end up in hospital with a needle in my arse, as had other people I had met travelling. For the record, that was not a complaint or a request. However, that is exactly the position I ended up in, not without a small amount of drama first. No, nothing quite as pedestrian as mere illness for me, oh, no, been there seen that. It's me after all, it needs to be much more exciting and unique than an illness or accident, no fun otherwise......

So I arrive in the Galapagos, meet the (lovely) people on my boat, chat, have lunch and head to Lobos Island for a spot of snorkeling. Marvellous, straight out there and up close and personal with the wildlife. Really. There am I having a lovely time snorkeling, seeing the fish and the sea lions when I look up and see a HUGE seal lion (male) swimming towards me. I didn't even get to finish that thought (I got to about "Wow that's HU..."), when bash and OUCH, it bit me. Yep, I was officially in the middle of the third bull sea lion attack of the year, hurrah! Luckily for me, it wasn't much of an attack, I was very lucky, and it just headbutted me, sunk it's jaws into my thigh, decided it didn't fancy Italian after all, and let go (rather than pulling half my thigh off). Also I'm immensely lucky that the lovely Steve from my boat, who I'd only met an hour or so before, saw it all, retrieved my fin which had come off in the melee, and stuck around to help me get back to the panga, rather than getting the heck out of there before the sea lion came back for seconds. Which might have been a possibility, as I was moving nowhere very fast. In fact, I was just rather surprised not frightened, I surfaced, and instead of screaming or shouting or anything dramatic (and maybe sensible..??!!) like that, I believe I just squeaked, faffed a bit trying to get my fin back on (whilst Steve no doubt was thinking "hurry up, hurry up, hurry up" and "sh*t that's a lot of blood" and scanning around us to see see if round two of attack of the sea lions was about to start), and finally made it back to the panga, where I calmly announced I'd been bitten as if asking for a cup of tea (apparently). Then it gets a bit hazy, shock settling in - but I think it was a bit of a 'Jaws' moment then, the guide shouting at everyone to get out out of the water, speeding back to the main boat, then speeding to the next big Island (again REALLY lucky, only 40 mins away) where I ended up, as I said, in hospital with a needle in my arse......

Two minutes after the attack.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, stayed out there for a week, still managed to see plenty of wildlife despite my injuries. The only time I cried throughout the whole experience (albeit briefly) was in hospital when they told me I wouldn't be able to drink because of the antibiotics and I faced a sober birthday! Of course I didn't have a sober birthday, I was plastered after one drink. Said goodbye my fantastic fellow guests (who had developed the ability to get out of the water remarkably fast if there were any bull sea lions about!). Met even more lovely people on my boat and generally had a good time despite it all (although I think I did freak them out a bit). Came home in a wheelchair, had lots of air hostesses feeling very sorry for me and upgrading me (very nice!) only to get this from my brother when I arrive: "So, you know Spiderman, when he got bitten by a spider he got all these special spider powers, does this mean you're going to be balancing a ball on your nose, going "arphh, arphh" and diving across the room if we throw fish at you soon?" I love being home...

A
XXX

Healing...?

We are glad she survived to tell the story as it´s great for our blog. It´s a survival story to be proud of and those scars will be shown off endlessly down the local after a few drinks. Heres to Angela.
Chris & Sam

Horse Riding In Patagonia

"Oh my God there is smoke coming in through the window sills!" "The fire is out of control Pancho!"
The 4x4 plunged deep into the core of the thick grey smoke, for a minute nobody could see out of the windows, and the fumes seeped through the seals scratching madly at our tender pink throats, making us gag. There was the occasional fierce glimpse of the forest fire meters away as we were driving through.
And well that was the start to our beautiful day horse riding in the stunning setting of Patagonia.

It was a weird start, but once we´d left the fire behind we arrived at a charming Finca (country estate). The horses were all saddled up, and our guide Jesus was stood by the wooden fence wearing a black boina (beret) awaiting our arrival.
Before we knew it we were all sat on our horses listening to Jesus teach us to horse ride in a record time of 2 minutes. My horse was the most impacient and kept trying to escape, according to Jesus he was just anxious to get started.
Jesus led the way, I was behind him with my horse Tregua, and Chris was about half way down the line.
We set off and Tregua became easier to control than I had expected him to be, so Jesus put me in charge of the line whilst he went to check out the others. I was trotting along, enjoying the fresh air and a backdrop of snowcapped mountains when I looked back down the line to see Chris holding up the line. His horse just seemed to be plodding along at snails pace, so Jesus gave him a little stick to whip Rosie with.
Once Chris had finally got over the fact that his horse was smaller than mine, and called Rosie rather than Clint or something manly, he started using the whip to which Rosie responded surprisingly well!
Rosie was off! She galloped ahead of the group into the country like a bullet, and you should have seen Chris laughing and bobbing up and down uncontrollably, it was an image that will remain in my mind for ever.

Note Rosie asleep as Chris rides her like Seabiscuit.

Eventually Rosie and Chris started working as a team and looked great cantering around, but Tregua (which means Truce) was a little competitive and determined to be the first back to the finca. So at the end of a very relaxing 2 hours Tregua and Rosie entered into a race, leaving the rest of the group behind, Tregua won by a head length and Jesus wasn´t too impressed with our antics.
We finished off the experience with a big asado (roast)and rosie wind swept cheeks.

Quote Of The Week

Occasionally everybody says silly things. Travelling together for one year, we generally get to hear ALL the silly things either of us say.
We spend quite alot of time laughing at each others comments. Tonight over a cracking pasta meal and a bottle of Rose we decided that we should make it a feature of the blog.
Each week, you lot get to decide which of us made the stupidest comment. Simply vote using the comments, Sam, or Chris. It will save us alot of time arguing over who said the dummest thing that week. We won't give the context in which the comment was said.....

Week 1 starts with:

Sam: "You are always going to be older than you were"

Chris: "I just don't find birds attractive"

Hit the comment button below...

Great Day on The Slopes

After 3 days of horrific weather we returned to the slopes for a baking blue sky day in great soft snow. Sams ankle seems totally healed now and I struggled to keep her out of the board park.

Wierd South America Fact....

....They don't sell Mars Bars here. They didn't in Bolivia, Peru, Chile, or Argentina. Its my essential snowbaording snack, and is sorely missed. I thought Mars was like Coca-Cola and was sold everywhere. Clearly not.

Hair Transoformation

It always happens to me. I go in to the hairdressers having firmly made up my mind that I want something, and the hairdresser says "Oh no! But WHY? It won't suit you. Please don't make me do that!Please Nooooooooooooooo!"
So the 1st time I went to the hairdressers yesterday I had a mad hair cut which is very Dallas, and at the same time I found out I have semi-curly hair already (odd). I came out feeling happy that my hair looked curly and big as planned.
One bottle of wine with lunch later and I was feeling like I hadn't made a drastic enough statement and was still searching for something, so I went back in the afternoon and got blond streaks!
Oh and I have a fringe too. So I managed to end up with a bit of all 4 options on the blog, wavy hair, that's big, with a fringe, and bits of it are platinum blonde.

Now...I wanted to put a picture on but I'm afraid you'll have to wait. My hives is playing up again and I woke up looking like I'd had a litre of collagen injected into my upper lip, it looked riddiculous! Move over Leslie Ash!

CHO-CO-LAAAAAAAA-TE

Mmmmmmm, yummm yummm, arrrrggggg, sssssssssslupy slurp, Aw Chiuauaaaaa!!!
Look at that chocolate!
Well we needed to replenish post Peru, our pants were falling off us so we have been stuffing our faces with this delicious stuff. My jeans are nice and tight again.

Beef Quest Completion

Date: 9th September 2006
Time: 23:00pm
Location: El Boliche "de Alberto", "Parillia y Pastas", Villegas 347, Bariloche, Rio Negra, Argentina, South America, Planet Earth.
Order: 1/2 Portion Bife de Lomo, 1/2 of Lamb, 1 Chorizo Sausage, and a Salad Mixta.
Photo Evidence:

Other Comments: The best beef in the world. As regular readers will know this was the second time we vistied the legendary resturant "Albertos" in Bariloche.
We had been told about the steak here from many different backpackers as far a field as Methven, New Zealand. The first visit hadn´t provided the goods. Upon Saturday nights visit we specifically told the waiter/cook we wanted to eat the most tender beef in the world. My God did he oblige. Imagine ice cream melting on a warm stove. This is what it was like to put a slice of this beef in your mouth. The HUGE steak knifes they gave you just needed to be rested on top of the steak. A simple movement back and forth was enough to cut through.
At Albertos they don´t give you a sauce, simply just the steak on a clean white plate. That´s enough, they know it, and you know it once you have tasted their slice of heaven.
In the words of Mastercard:
4 English Pounds: Two steaks of the best beef in the world.
5 English Pounds: One bottle of ´Trapiche Broquel Cabernet Sauvignon Merlot´
Priceless: How someone can make such a s**t salad in such an amazing resturant.

Colon Merlot

Don´t you just love wine buffs descriptions. Fruity, vanilla, oakey, mature, light, full bodied, blah blah bleee bleeeee, etc...are all words you will hear associated with wines (maybe not the last few).
But today I was having an afternoon tipple at a cosy bar, when curiosity overcame me, I twisted my 185cc bottle of Colon Merlot towards me to read the following on the label:

"It´s a wine of vivacious and brilliant colour, with an attractive velvety aroma. It´s a little shy in the mouth, but loyal and generous. Of a rounded and very comfortable flavour.
Like your friend, the fatty, who is noble and unconditional, and no matter how many times you forget him, you know he is always there, and will never fail you".

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ALL ABOUT!!!!???? I nearly fell off my bar stool with laughter!!!!
Well...I have to say my fatty friend was very tasty, and after reading the label I´ll certainly never forget Colon Merlot!!

Sam

P.S. Highly recommend Trapiche Broquel (Cabernet Sauvignon Merlot blend) for a very smooth red, definitively top of my list so far in all our wine tasting this year.

Happy Birthday Marge!!

Bet you were wondering if I was going to forget? Last night at dinner, we were both looking forward to seeing you when we get back, and we can´t wait to see the house. Missing you lots, have a great day. Going to ring you now, so you better be in.
Love you,
Chris & Sam

Back To Bariloche

We woke up on our final day in Cerro Catedral with slight hangovers. We were intending to head up the mountain but looking out of the window changed our minds. It´s snowing has been all night and it´s impossible to see anything. So instead we packed our bags and are heading back down to Bariloche for five days. Don´t worry though, Bariloche is only 11km away from Cerro Catedral so we´ll be back boarding in deep powder either tomorrow or Monday.
Chris

Hair Votes

As you probaly know, a Transvestite called Maria messed my hair up in Peru. Oh by the way in case you were confused this is Sam.
So yeah, as I was saying I once met this girl called Mariaaaaaa...well a guy...and my hair needs a re-vamp, and who better to help me decide what to do with it than you guys!!!!!

I mean, so far we asked you what we should have for boxing day diner and you voted for snake over puppies. Oh and then you chose Chris to frolick around naked on a beach in Australia! So I say the fate of my hair is now in your hands! I am obviously drunk and they are playing "Beeeee the Love Generation" in the supermarket, so what the hell, I´m feeling free and hippy!

So here are the choices and what you say ultimately...goes!
A) Dallas Style: Remember JR and the beautiful Big Haired women around him in Dallas? Usually the big hair was coupled with Pat Butcher style earings. Here is one of the classier cast members Victoria Principal, who is about 80 and still looks good, according to her it´s her miracle face creams she´s flogging on the shopping channel. The fact that her husband is a top plastic surgeon has nothing to do with it!

B) Diana from V: Chris says that he can´t remember a series called V and that if I do I am too old (or too spanish). Can anybody remember this series? Anyway, what do you think of Dianas tousseled look?

C) Brenda Walsh from 90210: Oh come on you MUST remember this one. I used to watch it dubbed and loved Dillon, but when I watched it in the UK I was devastated that his voice no longer had the husky quality of a 60 year old man, and it seemed girly in real life. Big dissappointment! Anyway Brenda´s hair was feathered and generally had a chunky fringe.

D) Hefs Girls: This is one of my favourite TV programmes! Kendra, Hollie and Whatyamicaller. Anyway Heff is going through a platinum blonde phase, which I think Kendra looks hilarious in, but I´d be going more for a honey blonde (actually don´t bother voting for this one, I´m not going to dye it blonde after last time! Photo is nice though ey guys!).

So, as they say on Big Brother "The Choice Is Yours". Hurry up and vote because I am itching to get to the salon.

Sam

Can Life Get Any Better....

Wake up in a King sized bed, wipe the sleep from your eyes and look out the window to a mountain blanketed in snow. They have started the lifts early so you wonder into the bathroom for a power shower. Once dry you stretch your legs as you slump down the stairs to drink a perfectly brewed tea in front of a roaring open fire. The waitress serves you croissants, toast, fruit salad, ham, cheese, jam and fresh orange juice.
The crisp mountain brings refreshing tears to your eyes as you strap on your board and hop on to the first lift of the day. Time for a stretch and a yawn before you are dropped off at the mountain peak with one of the most stunning views imaginable. You´ve seen the view before, but your stomach still flips at the sight of the sun rising hundreds of colours into a gigantic alpine lake. The slopes are groomed, and your first turn throws up a spray of last nights freshly fallen snow. The smile on your face tingles slightly as you feel the cracks in your lips from yesterdays rays. It´s not a normal ski holiday because you haven´t been at work for nine months. You have forgotten what it´s like to feel stess. All you worry about is making the next turn and whether the guy behind the bar at lunch will put enough rum in your hot chocolate.
Your day is perfect. You end it sitting on a white leather sofa, chatting about the day, listening to relaxing chilled out vibes, drinking a bottle of top quality champagne, and snacking on a plate of fries for a total of 8 pounds. Holy cow, this is it, life DOESN´T get ANY better than this.
Chris & Sam

P.S We aren´t trying to rub it in. It is occasionally all too easy to forget, and not appreciate what we are doing. When we are both at work again stressing our pants off, we will read this back and hopefully a sense of calm with overcome us that we have such great memories.

Beef Quest 4

Apparently in my absence, my wife declared Beef Quest over! It is not. We did go to the ledgendary ´Albertos´ Resturant in Bariloche on Wednesday night but it failed to produce the goods. We had heard about this resturant as far afield as New Zealand, and repeatedly until we actually arrived here, but, however good their steak was, it wasn´t good enough for me.
I had a better steak at my Nan & Grandads wedding anniversary, and Sam claims to a vague memory of a slihgtly better steak at the Bel & Dragon, Cookham.
We do believe that Albertos has the potential to produce the goods, so we are returning on Saturday night. We plan to explain Beef Quest to the waiter and then hopefully achieve Beef ecstacy. If we don´t succeed we are certain to succeed on Sunday night when we go to a resturant a taxi driver recommended, and everybody knows that taxi drivers are the best sources of information!
To be continued...
Chris

Moon Ski

The coolest full moon party in the world. Tomorrow night everybody stays at the resturant at the top of the mountain, pays 4 pounds for all you can eat and drink, then everybody boards back down together by moon light. Sounds like every night in Austria, except for the 4 pound bit.
Can´t wait, it will be one of those unforgetable nights.
Chris

Death Of A Hero

HOLEY MOLEY!!!!! Why didn´t anybody tell us????? I just found out through the Complete Lack Of Suprises blog that Steve Irwin is dead!!!!! Did you all know?
And what´s more he was killed by a sting ray, when only weeks ago Chris and I where stroking stingrays in the tropical waters of Tahiti!!
We are seriously gutted as I am sure many Aussies are too, but in defense of the stingrays we have to say that they are generally as harmless as a wet flanel.
He must have rrrrrreally pissed it off!
None the less, RIP Steve, and hope there aren´t too many animals in heaven.

Sam and Chris

P.S. Guys next time breaking news like this happens...tell us!

Caption Competition Time

Tropical Conditions

Industrial strength Ibuprofen worked wonders yesterday morning when I had my 2nd attempt at snowboarding. It was an increadible day, after days and days of glorious sunshine we woke up to a full on snow storm.
Visibility was...well there wasn´t any, so I kept bashing into giant moguls and falling over which I found hilarious after my 4th cognac ladden hot chocolate. Actually it was soooooo cold and windy, especially on the prehistoric open lifts, that it felt like you had a jelly fish stuck on your face! Aaaaaaarrrggggg!
But the restaurants offered shelter, hearty goulashes, a warm fire, and gallons of chocognac. The later of which mixed with the mega strength ibuprofen actually made me dribble (I am not kidding, I felt like a mental patient, but a happy one). I got really tipsy and kept doing impressions of Jack Nicholson in the ending of "The Shinning" which Chris didn´t find in the least funny, but I nearly weed myself so that´s what counts.
Anyway, today I´m reasting and tomorrow I´m going for another beating. We´ve heard here is a night descent because it´s full moon, so we are going for it this Friday, should be interesting.

Happy 6th Birthday Kate!!

Wow Kate we can´t believe you are 6 already!!! By the way, can you read yet? We can (just about) but we aren´t so good at writing.
We hope you have a very very good Birthday, and have lots of fun with mum, dad and the family.
A big kiss and we´ll see you soon cutie.
Chris and Sam xxxxxx

General Observations About Argentina

*They don´t have enough coins. Chris tried to pay for something that was 6 pesos with 7 pesos yesterday, the shop keeper looked at him as if Chris had asked him if he could borrow his car. "Don´t you have it in change!" barked the shop keeper.
This happens ALL the time, if you don´t give them the exact change they sometimes don´t serve you and even taxi drivers and bus drivers don´t seem to have change.

*Women carry their babies everywhere. They either don´t have push chairs or can´t be bothered with them. They carry them all slanty and I´ve seen the poor babies take a battering on their heads by the following; trolleys, people´s elbows, bags, lamposts, and even a door frame! This all happens whilst mums are totally oblivious chatting to their mates.

*Restaurant owners give homeless people free food. I thought this was lovely. There were hundreds of begars in Mendoza and the restaurant and bar owners took care of them, giving them little boxes of food.

*Pretty much everybody short changes you or overcharges you. Waitresses insist that you only gave them half of what you know you just gave them. Pharmacists give you half the amount of change they are supposed to, and when you remind them they pretend it was a mistake. Cleaners pick up anything you don´t lock up in your bag. Taxi drivers start their meters high in the hope that you won´t notice that it was double the minimum charge before you even got in. And so forth. This happens ALL the time, and I mean ALL the time. Makes me very very sad that they think this is ok. I´m sure they have a good reason to do it but I just don´t think it´s right.

*They have the best food in South America so far. Enough said.

Top Of The World

The day before yesterday I was way too jealous of Chris snowboarding, so I decided to have a go yesterday afternoon.
Chris kept telling me I was still limping, but I´d just screech "No I´m not, look" and try to walk as normally as possible without uttering expletives, and keeping a histerical sort of mental grin on my face to give the appearance of joy.
We got on a lift, I had to go up holding the board because it would have been too dangerous to scoot off with my bad foot. The button lift I had intended on catching was broken which meant I had 2 options. Get back on the lift or board down to base. I opted for the latter.
BIG mistake! I had very little control and half way down I broke down and cried like a 5 year old because of the pain. In a nutshell, my ankle ain´t fixed yet!!
I boarded down to the bottom by which time I´d given myself a fat lip by bitting it. I dumped the board, and got a lift to the top of the mountain where I stuffed my face with chocolate cake. Aaahhhhhh...much much better, look at that view!
Anyway, Chris is off boarding today and I´m at the bottom with my new friend. I´ve grown another Sam on my ankle as a result of yesterdays shananigans, but at least I can talk to her if I get a little bored of chocolate and headband shops at the base. My precioussssssss!

Cerro Catedral

Only 15 minutes from Bariloche is Cerro Catedral, a big patagonian ski resort. Chris and I felt like being proper travellers for a change and catch the local bus up to our posh hotel. That was interesting. The driver was on a mission to collect absolutely everybody, so we really didn´t need to worry about wether we would get on when we saw the rammed bus approach. Because he must have picked up about another 50 people after us.
It got to the point that I was doing ballet, there was only enough space on the floor for me to put one foot down.But we made it to out beautiful hotel and settled in. Yeah right! We didn´t even see the room and Chris was undressing in reception getting ready to go boarding!
The room wasn´t going to be ready till the afternoon so we headed towards the equipment rental shop.
Cerro Catedral is a pretty pretend alpine village. It has dozens of ski shops, chocolate shops (of course) and ... hundreds of people dressed in the same clothes!
Aparently these are big groups of portuguese teenagers in their last year at school. There´s about 2 teachers to 100 pupils, and they all wear exactly the same clothes (for identification I guess). This is an orange group.The funny thing is that none of them ski, so they get the lifts to the top of the mountain, sit on the snow and marvel at the stuff (it´s the 1st time most of them have seen it), and then come back down. That´s their schedule for the 5 day holiday.
It was hard to get a shot of Cerro Catedral without one of these technicolour groups in it, but I managed one...except I couldn´t help getting this strange guy in it. He kept following me.

Sam

P.S. Noticed anything missing from Chris´face in the last few entries?

Bariloche

"Wow look at him! He´s HUGE and gorgeous!!!" I said to Chris.
"He´s alright" Chris said with a hint of disinterest.
"Well I think he is absolutely gorgeous!" I replied bursting with excitement as I set eyes on the robust, and obviously well groomed male.
A lady with a red and white ski jacket obviously sensing my excitement popped up next to me out of nowhere, and said "You can touch him if you want to".
"Really?" I replied.
"Sure go ahead, his name is Julio" said the ski jacketed lady.
I hadn´t been able to take my eyes off Julio since I spotted him, but it wasn´t up till now that I noticed a bored look on his face. He sat lazily on the park bench looking as cheesed off as a teenager at a family gathering, whilst his friends partied in Ibiza unsupervised.
If only he could crack open the bottle of whisky around his neck I´m sure he´d down the whole damn thing in one gulp. But then Julios paws didn´t have opposable thumbs, and so he was destined to sit there sober all day waiting to pose for a photo with the ocasional tourist.
Julio (a huge Saint Bernard pooch) is probably a signature item in Bariloche, he tipifies the town.
Bariloche is trying to be an alpine European-looking place, and it managed it fairly well. It is warm, cosy, and its streets are linned with the most amazing leather boutiques, wine cellars, and delicatessens. And lets not forget the chocolate shops. There are hundreds of them, they all becon you inn with their free tastings, sweet smells, and glass shelves stacked with pyramids of the most tempting chocolate creations.
Baroliche also has more than its fair share of bars and restaurants, log fires feature in most of them which is much appreciated here as the cold air bites you on the cheeks savagely here.
It´s a lovely town and I am really looking forward to going back for a few days after Cerro Catedral. In the mean time all I have to remind me of Bariloche is a half eaten box of chocolates I brought up with me, and...the memory of Julios´ sweet slobbery face :o)

Sam x

Off Snowboarding !!!

Wetting ourselves with excitement as we are about to catch the bus to our hotel at the base of the mountain for 8 days of snowboarding on the Southern Hemispheres biggest ski resort, Cerro Catedral. WOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Congratulations!

James & Andrew on getting all those G.C.S.Es!
James - I´m sure you´ll have a wicked time at King Eds. Don´t mention my name to ANY of the teachers as it may get you off to a bad start, especially Piles the headmaster. However, do go check out the year photos at reception where I managed to get on the year photos regardless of whether I was actually in that year.
Andrew - top decision on the construction, i reckon our family has great skills running through our veins passed down from Grandad Bishop. When you finish can you come to Bariloche and manage the construction of our house on the Lake.
Laters Ladies
Chris

P.S. Congrats from me too!! Hope you are celebrating those brilliant results, well done! Sam x